All we ever do is say good bye...

Being an 'army girlfriend' comes with a lot of pride, happiness, sadness, etc. There are some days that are easy and there are other where I wonder, how am I ever going to make it through? Friend's don't really understand and it's frustrating. When they say stuff like, "Oh my boyfriend is going away for a week on vacation..." it makes me so angry. Vacation? War zone.. let's compare the differences. I feel like civilians take their relationships for granted. They can call their significant other when they please, the text messages, the time they can spend together when ever they want. One of my friends recently said to me that my boyfriend doesn't show me he loves me. ...Odd, when lately he's been away more than he's been home. I freakin get excited over a Skype call!! I'll take anything I can get. I love the fact that I am an army girlfriend, although we seem to be on the sidelines a lot of the time. Waiting and wondering are the hardest parts of this lifestyle. I am proud of my boyfriend and not many people can hold their head high and say their loved one is doing something wonderful for our country. When I see guys on my college campus in their ACU's, I just want to go up and talk to every single one of them. In a way, it's comforting. I can't wait until I can see my boyfriend again. I miss the physical part of our relationship. The simple things, like a kiss or holding his hand, are what I miss the most. Seeing civilian couples together in public is hard & yes, I get jealous, who doesn't? But, I have to keep pushing along; we all do. :( I just wish i we didnt have to keep saying good bye. It's so hard...i wish these two years would hurry up already. I'm ready to marry Austin now.

Once again. Another Goodbye:(

I don’t know where to start this post. So I guess I’ll start with thank you. Thank you for being the man that you are. Thank you for filling my heart with a love of such fierceness I can barely contain it. Thank you for extending the same respect you command from others. Thank you for having the integrity and strength to do the job that you do. Thank you for your unshakable work ethic. Thank you for your unwavering dedication to doing what’s right no matter the consequence. Thank you for not complaining each time the military plucks you up and sends you away at a moment’s notice. Thank you for being strong enough to leave your family behind while you fight a thankless war in a country that doesn’t want you. Thank you for reminding me every day that freedom isn’t free. Thank you for paying the price of that freedom in hard work, sweat, and tears. Thank you for enduring each missed holiday, birthday, and anniversary without a trace of bitterness. Thank you for witnessing my tears and calmly hearing out my frustrations when it all seems like too much. Thank you for all of this and so much more that I don’t have the words to express. I may not be able to tender the thanks of a grateful nation, but I can and do offer the thanks of a grateful girlfriend. Thank you for being my soul mate, best friend, and other half. I love you and miss you with every breath I take. I’m proud of you. I just want you home already...i can't take it. I love spending every minute with you. Just come back soon...or now. Please.

Military Girlfriend

I am a military girlfriend. I hold no formal recognition with the powers that be I am at the bottom of the chain. I hold no Military ID card; I am not a dependent or a parent. The man I love may face unspeakable dangers and I am at the mercy of those who possess this recognition for news. I understand this and accept this. I have promised to be here for him. They may say I am insane for making such a commitment, but I hold onto our promises and have faith that he will come home soon...safe. There is no ring on my finger to symbolize our commitment, though I love him no less for it. I hope every day that he talks to me, because a simple phone call or text message brings the greatest spectrum of emotions smiling with tears in my eyes from so much joy and pain. My relationship is based on a brief communication where I love you and I’m okay speaks more than volumes and gives me the strength to keep going. I take no moment spent together for granted. I hold onto every touch, kiss, and every word. I have memorized the feel of his skin, his smell, the sound of his voice and I play it over and over in my mind so that I will never ever forget. I cry myself to sleep some nights because missing him hurts so badly, but wake up the next morning, brush myself off and start a new day. If you think being a soldier is tough, try loving one. If you think soldiers are strong, you should look at their girls.

Gosh i'm fat...

Soooooo today i skyped the boyfriend and hung out with Will. Gosh i work too much. I need another job. A better job:( Anyways, Will and i went to McDonalds and got 50 chicken nuggets!! We are gonna get fat!!!!! Sorry Austin but im gonna be a fatty when you come home. haha. Gotta love the bestie.