Joes:)

Went to eat at Joe's Crab shack today. Rachel and i took pictures in the bathroom like losers. I saw my friend Baylee today!! She came home from college for Christmas :) I also so Matty which is good. After Joe's, Will and i went to Aarons house and drank with Aaron and Denver and their roomies. It was awkward because each of them like me but everything went fine. I had my first Flaming Dr. Pepper:P I need Christmas to come soooo bad because i feel like im dying without Austin. I need himmmmmm. UGHHHHHHHH 4 days. COME ONNNN:(

PISSED!

AHHHHH i feel like ripping someone's head off. So guess what?! You'll never guess. Rachel AND Austin fucking lied to me. I remember clearly asking EACH of them what all they did with each other. And i was expecting the worst and i was OKAY with it. But EACH of them said they didnt have sex with each other. Rachel said she only had sex with one person. And Austin said he didnt have sex with her. Now normally im ok with the fact that people have sex. I get it because ive had mistakes too. But damn why did they have to lie to my face? I've never felt so betrayed in my life. I'm so ANGRY! I almost feel like saying screw them both. If i had KNOWN that i wouldve never gotten so close to Rachel. I wouldve never become BEST FRIENDS with her. She thinks i have no right to know this?! I'm his girlfriend and she's my best friend!! What the hell. This is such bull shit. I can't stand liars...i cant. I dont even want anything to do with them anymore. Austin hurt me so bad. He claimed he had no feelings for her. None at all. That she wasnt for him. If she wasnt for him why the hell did he go and have sex with her?! I mean is he really one of those guys that only wants sex. I don't understand. Is that all he wanted with me? I'm questioning everything now. FUCK THIS.

I did something crazy awesome:)

I love this man SO much that i wrote it in the back of Will's drive way with Erin's chalk...I feel kind of nerdy but it was so much fun doing it. :) I'm such a good girlfriend:D I'm the luckiest girl in the world. Who knows maybe this is the guy i'm gonna marry.... :) I could be happy with that:P
I love him. And it's such a strong word to say to someone. But i mean it entirely. Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. I'm not hearing any heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love--well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived. <3